The reason why I wear Blue

On February 10, 2012 by Cherise Shockley
The reason why I wear Blue
By Irina dzhambazova
I will wear blue. This Friday. And the next. And the one after. Partly because many in the diabetes community will. I hope. Partly because November also marks my D anniversary. This is year perhaps the toughest. My first. As I sit back and remember what life was a year ago just before and just after the diagnoses and what life is right now I feel content. With life and with myself. Simply because it got better. Way better. As I left the hospital ward I promised myself I will not give in to diabetes but rather use it as a stepping stone to a healthier lifestyle. And I managed to keep that promise.
 Despite the setbacks. Despite the bursts of paranoia. Despite the anger. Despite the highs. Despite the lows. And I feel proud. November is my month of my pride. Because when I look back at the past year I cannot even count all the various places where I have done my insulin shots. Concerts, big squares, small tents, restaurants, festivals, airports, planes, trains, park benches, parties, the seaside, the countryside, Northern Europe, Southern Europe. And so on. The list goes on as I see it as the single most accurate determinant that it has been a meaningful year. I come to understand that life has been and will remain colorful.
  Now it is blue but not because I am sad but rather because I am proud and I want others to know that. As they accept who I am and how I have coped with the struggle I will accept myself. As they see my ability to move on and go forward maybe they will be able to do that with themselves. Whatever the situation, whatever the circumstance. A year ago I paid a price for something. Lifestyle, genes, choices or the environment I live in. Perhaps I will never learn what was it exactly I paid for. As the rest of almost half a million Bulgarians that knowingly or not have diabetes would not. But in the end it doesn’t really matter. As long as we learn what to do about it. As long as others learn that we exist and are living human beings around rather than a mere statistic in the news and an insurmountable burden to the healthcare budget.
As long as we keep fighting. I am the generation of Occupy. I am the generation that looks for alternatives and finds answers. I am the generation that doesn’t have the choice of not making it. Life. Promises. Hopes. And in that generation I will be the kid that actually will be alright. The kid that will wear blue on Friday.
Irina- Thank you for sharing why you will wear blue every Friday and on WDD.
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