Guest Post:Diabetes Blessings by Ashley Rose
When I was first diagnosed, I was scared, confused and overwhelmed. I was also angry. I had been taught that living a healthy lifestyle would keep diabetes from becoming a part of my life until I was much older. Not so when your pancreas has plans for early retirement. After the initial shock wore off though, I began to look at my diagnosis as a blessing.
The journey to my diagnosis began when I started getting sick at the gym. I was getting an “I need to stop what I’m doing RIGHT NOW!” feeling after which I’d feel horrible for the rest of the day. There were many late night hospital visits in which I had no idea what was going on, but hoped that the doctor on call would. My body was completely out of control and no one could seem to find an explanation for it. My diagnosis gave me answers when I thought there were none to be found.
A few months later, I took to the internet to see if there was anyone else out there like me. My search brought me to some social networking sites for diabetics and to twitter which later brought me my next diabetes blessing – the D-OC. I can’t imagine life without such amazing and supportive friends. Knowing that no matter what you’re never alone with what you’re going through is a very powerful thing.
My most unanticipated diabetes blessing is one that I wasn’t even aware of until the DSMA diabetes and mental health chat back in September. The first question posed that night was a simple one (how has diabetes affected your emotions surrounding food & body image?) but the answer that came to mind was unexpected. At the time of my diagnosis, I was in my early 20’s, I wasn’t quite comfortable in my own skin yet, and I felt as though my body was out of control. This led to a relationship with my body and with food that was dysfunctional at best. My diagnosis vastly improved both. Having my diagnosis meant that I was no longer reacting to inexplicable changes in my body, but I FINALLY knew the basic reasons for them. Not only that, but I knew what to do to help myself when necessary. I don’t have all the answers but now when I look in the mirror I no longer see a body that’s out of my control. I see a woman who’s a full time pancreas and not always perfect but trying her best. My confidence and self-acceptance have been restored and I have my diabetes to thank for it.
It just goes to show that we can find blessings in the most unexpected places.
Ashley Rose is living with Type 1 diabetes
You can read more about Ashley at Tales of Swagging
You can follow her fabulous Tweets:dream4muse